Seeking joy and meaning in a joyless mind and meaningless existence

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

No One Ever Knows or Loves Another

I feel like no one really "gets" me.  One could easily argue that no one really gets anyone else.  And fuck me, but I haven't had a circle of friend that I relate to in over a decade and a half.  Don't get me wrong...I have some wonderful people in my life, but I feel estranged even from those old friends with whom I've shared so much.  I feel alienated and disconnected.  A large part of this is an "all or nothing" mentality of whatever personality disorder most aptly describes me, but I feel myself pulling away from those few still left in my life all the same.
Tired Old Hack
I've decided to shut down my other blog and leave this one on a "need to whine" basis only.  No matter what I do, people don't want what I'm offering.  I'm almost to the point of giving up on my dream of writing altogether.  But that would inevitably lead to thoughts of self-destruction, as I can conceive of no other purpose to my existence.