I've spent a lot of years observing men's behavior in public restrooms. Not in the way you might be thinking of! (OK, there was that one time...) But I've notice that a lot of guys adopt a particular stance—striking a kind of pose, if you will—while at the urinal. My theory is that using a public urinal produces a vestigial feeling of vulnerability that brings out a defensive instinct, and a guy's stance is a learned behavior designed to overcome this. Or maybe people are just weird.
Here are the archetypes which I have personally observed:
- The Plain Jane: Purely functional...Get in, get out.
- The Multitasker: Reading something held in one hand.
- The Gregarious: Talking or texting on a cell phone.
- The Teapot: One fist on a hip, arm crooked.
- The Superhero: Both fists on hips, feet wide apart.
- The Eyes-On-Your-Own-Work: Hunched over, shielded from view.
- The Eyes-On-Other's-Work: Has a roving gaze. Not necessarily gay, might just be doing a comparative analysis.
